Recently, I have been faced with the reality that rings true for many of us out there who are getting married. Yes, the feelings of joy, anxiousness, excitement, but also missing a person that should be there on your big day. It is a moment that you and this person may have talked about, dreamed about, and pictured for years. It is a person who has shared so many mile-marker moments with you. They should be there. They wanted to be there. You wanted them there, but they are missing and you miss them terribly.
No matter what you believe spiritually, it is important to remember that those people helped guide you to this moment whether they are physically present or not. They are proud of the man or woman that you have become, and they would be overjoyed for you in finding the right person to share the rest of your life with.
I have spent a lot of time trying to find ways to acknowledge and honor that person(s) presence and significance on this day. Here are a few creative ideas I have found along the way:
1. Light a lantern in honor of that person whether it is a real candle or an LED depending on your venue restrictions. Not only is a great way to signify someone who has been lost, but it will look beautiful in a dimmed venue.
2. Create a photo table that is filled with pictures of those people as well as small items that were theirs or remind you of them.
3. Add a small picture lock-it of those people to your bouquet or boutonniere or even the back of your heels or cuff links, so they can walk with you during your day.
4. Add a chair to your ceremony with an item of theirs, a picture, and some flowers.
5. Honor them during your ceremony by a poem, a moment of silence, or a few words about their significance on this day.
6. Add Rosemary to your bouquet or boutonniere. Rosemary symbolizes significance, loss, and remembrance. I love this idea because it is not only symbolic, but it is beautiful and has a pungent smell that will constantly remind you why you added it to your arrangements.
7. Get a custom made memory candle. You can add quotes, names, or pictures to these and place them wherever you think is best. I think it is great to put them on your sweetheart table or your placecard table signifying that there is a seat for them on this special day.
8. A balloon release. Fill a balloon for each person that is missing from your special day. After your ceremony take a moment to release them one at a time and say a memory of them with your new spouse. Make it a special, private moment as you release it to the sky.
Taking a moment to acknowledge those who are so greatly missed on your special day is so meaningful. I hope one or many of these ideas spoke to you as a means to do so.
With Love,
Lisa Jaroscak
this is a great blog post…. during my recent 20 year vow renewal we honored my dad and my husbands mom which we lost in 2015… made us feel like they were part of our day with a simple sign and flowers.
These are such beautiful ideas! I especially love the Rosemary idea.. I had no idea what Rosemary symbolized. We were missing a grandma and a grandpa at our wedding in 2010- I wished we had some of these ideas back then to honor them on that day!